Alex's story

There are now over 100,000 over 65s across Scotland suffering from chronic loneliness. That's one older person on every street. 

One of those is Alex, who kindly agreed to share his story with us.

Alex, 72, had a career as an engineer that took him all over the world, including time working in Germany and Saudi Arabia. He was married in the 1970s and had a daughter. The marriage ended and, tragically, Alex’s daughter died aged 20 from a brain tumour.  

In 2007, Alex returned to Scotland. Born and brought up in Motherwell, he returned to his roots. But after many decades away, Alex had no connections in the town and soon felt isolated. “I’ve lived on my own since I came back to Scotland. I don’t have any family or friends around now.

The reality is that so many people fall away from your life as you get older. And before you know it, you’re on your own. Sure, I put the TV on in the corner, but it’s really just to stop the silence.

Two years ago, Alex was at the doctor’s surgery where someone recommended he give Age Scotland a call, and he now receives a weekly call from the friendship services.  “I can’t tell you how much I look forward to Friday afternoons, when I have my weekly chat. We can talk about anything, such as stories from the past, gardening (I miss mine), classical music, or just how I’m feeling.  

Having someone to talk to reduces my anxiety about being lonely. It has been absolutely wonderful and made a big, big difference to my life.   

Alex is suffering from ill health now. After several heart attacks and being diagnosed with COPD, he doesn’t get out and about as much as he used to. Other than his friendship calls from Age Scotland, Alex says the only people he speaks to on the phone are doctors, the dentist, or the council.  

“Last Christmas I got a friendship call on Christmas Day and it was brilliant. It was so lovely to have someone to talk to, someone who asked questions and was open to listening to me.  

“For the past few years, I’ve been on my own at Christmas. You just get used to it. I keep myself to myself and make some kind of meal, but I don’t see or speak to anyone. I’d put on that noisy thing in the corner – the TV – just to stop the silence.  

“I used to love gardening, but I don’t have one now, and I really miss it. Also, classical music. I’ve got a passion for classical music. I used to sing in a church choir with my Dad before he passed away.   

The weekly friendship call I get on a Friday sets me up for the whole weekend and leaves me feeling on top of the world.

It makes the weekend not seeing anyone more tolerable. It is such a wonderful thing for people like me with no family or friends to talk to. Getting these calls from Age Scotland has meant the world to me.”